Divorce is rarely straightforward – especially with children involved. At Calthrops, we know how stressful this period can be, and we’re committed to helping families find practical, child-focused solutions that minimise conflict and support your child’s wellbeing.
Divorce and the Law: The Basics
In England and Wales, the introduction of ‘no-fault’ divorce has helped make the process less adversarial. Now, couples can separate without assigning blame, and the focus shifts to practicalities such as finances and, crucially, child arrangements.
The formal process involves applying for divorce, waiting for the court’s conditional order, and – after a further period – the final order. Sorting out living arrangements and financial settlements early is key, as the court will expect these matters to be addressed before finalising the divorce.
From ‘Custody’ to ‘Child Arrangements’
The term ‘child custody’ is now outdated in UK law. Today, courts make ‘Child Arrangements Orders’, focusing on where a child lives and how much time they spend with each parent. This shift encourages parents to work together, with the child’s welfare being the paramount consideration within any arrangement decision.
A Child Arrangements Order can include:
• ‘Live with’ orders (where the child’s main residence will be)
• ‘Spend time with’ orders (when and how the child sees the other parent)
Parental Responsibility
Parental responsibility means the legal rights and duties a parent has for their child. Mothers have this automatically from birth. Fathers usually have it if they were married to the mother or named on the birth certificate. Parental responsibility includes decisions on education, medical care, religion and upbringing – but it does not guarantee time with the child.
How Are Child Arrangements Decided?
Where possible, parents are encouraged to agree arrangements themselves, sometimes with help from mediation, solicitors or even modern technologies such as parenting apps. Mediation is often faster, less stressful, and less costly than court. If agreement isn’t possible, the family court can be asked to decide. The court always focuses on what is best for the child, using a ‘welfare checklist’ that covers:
• The child’s wishes (depending on age and maturity)
• Physical, emotional, and educational needs
• The effect of any change in circumstances
• Each parent’s ability to meet the child’s needs
• Any risk of harm
Shared care arrangements are increasingly common, but this doesn’t always mean a 50/50 split of time. The focus is on what suits the child, not the parents.
If Parents Can’t Agree
If mediation fails, or isn’t suitable (for example, due to domestic abuse), you can apply to the court for a Child Arrangements Order. The court may ask for a section 7 report from Cafcass (Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service), who can speak to both parents and sometimes the child.
Courts can make interim arrangements if needed and will always try to minimise disruption to the child. The process may involve several hearings before a final order is made.
Legal Aid and Support
Legal aid for family law is available in limited circumstances, mainly where there is evidence of domestic abuse or a risk to the child. This can help cover legal advice, mediation, or representation in court. For others, there is free guidance available through Citizens Advice and other local services.
Practical Advice for Parents
• Prioritise your child’s wellbeing: Children cope better when parents put their needs first and avoid conflict.
• Stay organised: Keep a factual record if arrangements are broken.
• Be child-focused: Try to shield your child from adult disputes and avoid putting them in the middle.
• Seek help if you need it: Early legal advice can prevent issues from escalating.
How Calthrops Can Help
Calthrops has years of experience guiding families through divorce and child arrangements. Our team provides clear, sensible advice in plain English, and we are committed to achieving the best outcome for you and your children – whether through negotiation or, where necessary, the courts.
If you’d like a confidential conversation about your situation, get in touch today. We do not offer legal aid, however, we do offer a free consultation providing initial advice.
